The first ever Superhero movie was about Superman (Okay that is debatable. First feature film about a comic book superhero is unquestioned). 55 years later (and five animated Batman films), he got his first animated film as a promotion for Superman Returns, and it sucks. It is a horrible combination of the Donner films and Superman the Animated Series that do not mix with way too little plot.
Duanne Capizzi wrote it, and he has written and produced for many good animated shows and movies including a few I have reviewed. It is directed by Curt Geda, another familiar face to me. So there is some clear talent working on this movie, but like many DTV films it feels more like a padded 30 minute episode than a movie, and both of these men are more of TV creators than movie creators.
I just have to say it, this is not in continuity with Superman The Animated Series (STAS). It stars some of the same actors like Dana Delany and Tim Daly, and the same animation style, but the characterizations are all off especially for Lois, Brainiac, Lex, and Mercy. In addition Capizzi was very clear it is not canon to it. It is also very clear that this version of Brainiac is not Kryptonian. Lex and Brainiac meet in this movie, while they previously met in The Animated Series before Brainiac met Superman.
It starts with Lex looking at his Kryptonite, and this just feels weird. For one Lex is voiced by Grodd’s actor, Powers Boothe, and it is just off seeing that in the STAS design. In STAS Lex is uncannily calm, careful, and a schemer. He almost always has a half smile. Here he is like Gene Hackman’s Lex, Loud, crazy, and a mad scientist. The animation style and backgrounds do not match it. Then there is Mercy, Lex’s loyal bodyguard. She now has blonde hair, and she acts more like Harley Quinn than Mercy. Instead of being quiet and professional she is making jokes the entire time. In fact her actress has voiced Harley Quinn many times. It does not help that none of her jokes are funny.
Lex build a super robot to guard Earth, but Brainiac attacks, hacks it, and he uses it to fight Superman. Superman just hits him hard and wins destroying Brainiac. The real problem is all the other stuff going on. Brainiac is way too emotional. He is supposed to be emotionless and cold, but here he is joking, smiling constantly, and using big reactions. Lois is introduced, as she runs into the men’s bathroom to grab Jimmy. I hate that scene. Show some basic decency Lois. In addition she is incredibly stupid, and tries to watch the fight from a giant light pole, and needs to get saved when it falls over. Does she have a death wish?
After the fight Lex finds Brainiac’s robot mind, and they make an alliance. Brainiac gets Lex’s war robot now with an upgrade of Kryptonite weapons, can track down Superman with a piece of his DNA (I think Lex can use that in many better evil ways), and can theoretically kill Superman. After that Lex will challenge him in a robot suit. This means Superman is dead for both of their benefits, and Lex is the new hero of Metropolis. I have no idea how Lex has a robot more powerful than anything Brainiac can make… Actually this version of Brainiac is so underpowered in every way compared to his STAS counterpart it makes sense. The real question is how this version of Brainiac was ever a threat anyway.
Again the problem is the giddiness these villains have. Instead of contrasting with Mercy’s silent evil, Lex’s imagination, and Brainiac’s imagination void attitude they are all happy jokesters.
After some bad romantic scenes where the emotions are too big to match the animation style Brainiac attacks Clark and Lois knowing Superman is there. The fight is really generic. Kryptonite against Superman, Lois is injured, and robot against Superman. Where have we seen that before? Lois gets Kryptonite poisoning in the fight, and she is now dying.
The one good thing is Superman’s black eyes from the fight. It helps make Superman look vulnerable, and it is a unique look.
After this come many bad scenes of everybody talking to pad the runtime. The major issue they refuse to use any forms of the words “kill” or “die” making the dialogue just sound unnatural. At least Perry and Jimmy almost discovering Clark is Superman is a little funny.
Clark goes to the fortress of solitude to try and heal Lois, and Brainiac follows him. Clark destroys the knowledge of the fortress to stop Brainiac from getting it (again none of this would make any sense if it was connected to STAS). This is a great summary of this movies problems, broken potential. Everything interesting is just done, and the movie moves on to the next subplot. Should Clark destroy knowledge instead of letting it get preserved by evil? Just done. Will Clark have a dramatic adventure in the Phantom Zone. Just done. Sure it is later revealed he never actually left the Phantom Zone, but that is not a good scene. At least it clearly tried to be great.
After an overly long scene of Lex getting ready to turn on Brainiac it is revealed Clark never left the Phantom Zone, as Lois wants him to quit being Superman. It is resolved, and it leads to… Exactly where we would be if he did leave it. After this Brainiac betrays Lex. Lex uses his contigency plan. Brainiac anticapted this and counters it meaning their whole partnership and double cross lead to… Exactly where we would be if Lex was cut and Brainiac just build that suit himself.
That is the main problem. This is only enough story to last for around 20 minutes, and all these meaningless subplots take up too much time. I cannot even find a moral to connect everything other than really basic stuff like be loyal and sacrificial and good things will happen.
Lex gives some good comedy, as Clark comes to the rescue. It is a normal fight, but it is overly long with Brainiac refusing to die over and over. Even weirder the big final villain is not Lex nor Brainiac but Mercy.
At the end Clark’s presence heals Lois in a deus ex machina, hordes of subplots are resolved, and Lex is on the verge of going to jail due to the Lexcorp logo being on some of Brainiac’s stuff. That will not hold up. It can easily be explained that Brainiac took it from him just like he took the robot.
This movie is overall a waste of time with very little actually happening. The small details are competently done, but that cannot change it is a normal episode hyper padded. I think it is obvious they had very little time to make a movie to go with Superman Returns forcing them to use an existing animation style and quickly write up a plot. One Tree Star.
The Animation Historian 